Getting Through It

  Robert Frost once said that, “The best way out is always through.” But what if Lonely comes to visit, and then overstays his welcome? And worse, invites his friends Despair, Depression, and Sadness to pile on.  How do you get through that? I’m at a point in my life where I find that I’m facing it alone. And I’ve never been one to do alone very well. Oh, I was very much the loner when I was young. But that was mostly because I was so shy I had a hard time making friends. I outgrew the shyness in time. I still never had a lot of friends, but my significant other always became my best friend. When that becomes the habit of your life, it’s a hard one to break. It would have been nice to have had the same best friend for my entire life. I mean that’s the way it is supposed to be right? That’s the way it is in fairy tales and movies. And when we see a couple celebrating fifty years of marriage or more, we all are happy for them and want the same thing. At least most of us do. At least I always did. But it didn’t work out like that for me. I was married four times (albeit to only three different women) and had some pretty significant relationships in between. When one of those ended I grieved, but I didn’t panic. Because deep down I knew that another relationship was just around the corner. All I had to do was like Mr. Frost suggested - walk through the grief, and then turn that corner.

  But this time it’s different. My best friend is gone. I’m doing my best to work through the grief. But I see no corner to turn. So what do I do now? That’s not a rhetorical question my friends. I really do need answers. See that little comment thingy down at the bottom of this article. I really do expect it to light up with your brilliance, because I’m in the dark over here. And if there’s a way through this I must be missing it. And yes I know that I’m not truly alone. I know that the Lord is with me and that I’m never truly alone. And that is a comfort. But yet there is still this empty feeling inside that won’t go away. I know that I now have two of my very best friends on the other side watching over me and waiting for me. My soul can’t wait to fly to them. But in the meantime, I’m dealing with the here and now. I don’t foresee a new woman coming into my life and becoming my new best friend forever. I’m really very afraid of that, because I fear the risk of having to go through all this again. I never thought I would outlive anyone. Yet here I am.

  So I spend my days with trivial things and menial chores. But each day quickly becomes like the previous one. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not asking for pity or sympathy here. I’m asking for solutions to getting rid of my uninvited guests. I’m asking for ideas on how to get through something that doesn’t seem to have an “other side” to head towards. If any of you experienced the same thing I’m going through, please tell me how you got through it. I know it’s a process and sometimes it takes time. But I don’t seem to be moving through anything here. I’m at a standstill. And I know that just sitting down and waiting for the end to come is not what I want to do. So I don’t want to become any more acquainted with those uninvited guests I mentioned than I already am. And I don’t want to stay where I’m at in life. So what’s next? Where do I go from here? I will pray and have been praying about it. Maybe my answer will come through one of you guys. And that would be just as awesome as if God came and told me what to do in person.

  While I’m waiting to hear from you, I would remind you that if you have a significant other in your life never take that for granted. Cherish every moment you get to spend with your best friend forever. Because sometimes forever is not as long as you might think.